A Matter of the Heart
By Amy Gentry
“My beloved is mine, and I am his…”
Song of Songs 2:16
From boy meets girl to homecoming and prom dates.
Have you given any thought to the dating parameters for you own children. When I was growing up the magic age was 16. But aren’t we tempted to start the whole male/female thing a lot earlier than that. On a play date we see 2 toddlers holding hands and trip over our purse trying to reach our iphone to snap a picture to post on our Facebook wall for all to ohh and ahh. Then our little sweetie gets into elementary school and has a BFF who is the opposite sex – I can hear “…sittin’ in a tree k.i.s.s.i.n.g…” ringing in my ears. During the middle school years, the “dating” begins, although they never actually go out on dates. Finally, in high school, group dating then one on one car dates. What has your little precious gained through this process?
Unfortunately, the whole process could be counterproductive. What happens is our children make heart connections to person after person and they give pieces of their heart away, little by little. Eventually they find “the one” and enter into a marriage without a whole heart, because parts of it have been given away one by one. The bible says, “…not to awaken love until the time is right.” (Song of Songs 2:7, 3:5, and 8:4)
Have we lost sight of why our children date? What should dating for a Christian teen look like? These are questions that you and your husband need to define early. But make sure that all parameters are made with the goal of guarding you child’s heart, not from a place of not trusting you child or their date.
The goal of guarding your child’s heart –
“I am my beloved’s, and his desire is for me.”
Song of Songs 7:10